_definitely, m a y b e ||Jay

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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Sunlight, she needed the sunlight -- she needed to look at it, to know that it was a real thing, that the cold in her soul could be destroyed by it's heat. She needed to feel the kiss of the sun's rays on her skin, on her clothes, her hair, infusing her scent with molten heat. Rin, poor Rin, broke herself against the darkness that was chasing her outside of her dreams, following so closely at her heels she imagined it's sticky breath on her neck, panting over her, knowing, knowing she was within it's clutches. It was more than the Wolf, more than the spike of shame and embarrassment that follows her emotional attachment to the beast. She was followed, stalked, hunted, but there was a frightening level of dismissal in the oncoming darkness, the unbroken storm swirling over her head. She felt it, in her bones, the ache sliding through her marrow, and knew it was as inevitable as rainfall. She could no more outrun it than she could outrun the coming nightfall.

So she stumbled through her dreams, gasping and clutching at her sheets, muffling her whimpers against the cloth of her pillow. She choked on the scent of her roommates, hating the feeling of aggression that immediately spiked up her spine at their eroding, invading stench; they came in, their lives crowding around her, cornering her, and she hated it, hated it. This was her room, her den, her safety, and yet she never found any here -- running away and staying as far from the others as much as possible. It would have been different if she hadn't been the first to move in the room; she would have ducked her head, and given in-- but this was something else. This was a declaration of war, and none of the girls knew it.

Hot, primal mercilessness woke her when she dreamed, catching her between the horror of her night times and the madness of her day times. Caught, like prey, the Wolf felt the impossible need to break away, to gnaw at the edges of it's bindings, to hold the girl responsible. Fix this it often said, it's voice cutting through her mind like a knife, without words, but the possessiveness of the accompanying emotions often brought her to her knees.

Clouds followed her. Thunderstorms sounded in her head. She was a tempest on the verge of snapping, on the edge of bursting at the seams and exploding. Dangerous, dangerous, to walk this line, to keep existing in this state without speaking. The Wolf was on the prowl, hunting through the maze of her thoughts, snapping and feral, nearly foaming at the mouth. They were caught, caught, they couldn't get out. It was too much, staying here, being like this -- Rin covered her ears as if it would stop the resounding snaps and growls from resonating in her head. Hunching her shoulders under the covers, she peered over the lip of it at the clock and suffered a sigh that passed through her lips. Two in the afternoon and she was still suffocating herself under her blanket, buried under the sickening, oily feeling of scum on her skin.

Feeling filthy, the girl rolled over onto her back, glad that for once her roommates weren't here, weren't watching her odd behavior, judging, judging -- she knew it, and snapped her head to the side in her anger, looking out the window toward the gorgeous day awaiting her. Still waiting, like every day, shining through her window, calling to the Wolf, calling to the Girl.

There was a thirst that wasn't thirst in her body; aches made her slow, her head feeling stuffy from being in this stale dormitory air. Sunlight -- she needed the sunlight; rising up, fingers deftly opening the latch for the window, she hung out over the lip, tilting her face up as it caressed her face, sinking deeper; Rin felt as if the hot coiling of darkness strangling her breath was being slowly obliterated by the sunlight -- as long as she could soak a little longer, exist a little longer this way. Wearing a white tank top, her black mane of hair unbound and wild, Rin leaned out of the window, looking over her shoulder briefly. Longing didn't describe the feral need that slammed into her, seizing her by the very throat.

Fingers tightening on the cold steel, Rin's hair went flying behind her like a banner as she jumped out of the second story building, the Wolf surging through her, glittering in her black eyes as she smiled -- a smile that deserved sharp teeth and not human ones. Exhilaration of falling, freedom leaving her -- a moment where the Wolf almost ripped out of her very skin before it settled, and she landed, knees cushioning the fall; the pain of her fall only made it sweeter as she pushed herself up, feeling twinges from her ankles, a bruise reddening her knee. That grin again, eating away at her, devouring her heart soul and mind as happiness as vicious as a wolf's grin suffused her limbs, made her dart into the lawns, her head tilted back toward the sun, wearing shorts and a tank top. Though her socks dampened from the mud, though the sun's heat was just on this side of uncomfortable, Rin was happy, finally, yes, finally -- her heart opening to the Wolf as they lingered in this strange dance of harmony.

Fangs and fingers intertwined, fur and flesh, heart and soul, and it was alright, though others would be looking sideways at her. It was alright, for now, yes, for now, with her body filled with this golden light. Things would be alright, they had to be. She smiled, an innocent turn of her mouth that accentuated her petite proportions.

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word count;; 977
tags;; Jay, open ;3
OOC;; happiness ^-^

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[Jayden Richardson]

Eyes closed, the otter silently sighed and let out a silent delighted yip as he dived underwater again for the twentieth time that afternoon. He just loved the sea, it called to him. If he wasn’t a Northern River Otter, he thought he would’ve been a Sea Otter or a dolphin. Jay swam to the surface and lay on his back, tail swishing from side to side, propelling him through the water. The boy’s thoughts went from light and happy to dark, twisted thoughts as he remembered the first time he had shifted. She had only asked about going to the cinema to see the new Shrek film but she had repeated it over and over and over....

OK, time to go. Don’t want to go down that road again.

With that thought in mind, Jayden swam to the shore, shifting into a human as he did so. Luckily, he had brought a towel with him. Once he had dried himself and got dressed, he stuffed the wet towel in a bag he had brought along and looked at the sea sadly. He always hated going away from the sea, being away from the warmth of water. Well, technically it wasn’t warm all the time but it didn’t matter to Jayden. To him, water was just water – no matter the temperature. A single tear rolled down his cheek before he realised he was being stupid. He could always come back tomorrow. He quickly wiped the tear before going back to campus for some social time.

Being an otter meant that Jayden wasn’t just quick in the water but also on land. He found himself back in the Flamingo Lawns in no time. He stopped for a minute, basking in the sunlight, but that’d be a mistake. As soon as he stopped, a girl with a mane of black ebony hair landed on the ground. He got out her way and carried on walking to a tree he always sat under and produced a book from his bag. It was on Greek Mythology, a favourite interest of his.

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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She felt like dancing, like moving her body round and round until she was too dizzy to stand up right -- this energy was not unnatural to her, no, no, this was a natural high that she often felt when the darkness finally disappeared, when she was finally able to escape the horror of her nightmares. Here, yes, here, with the moon so far from haunting her vision, with the sun burning through her sorrow, she was as she had once been when she was younger: as free as the wolf.

Rin landed on the ground, feeling the twinge of pain without caring, for the Wolf was there, and the Wolf would not be denied; together they had stepped forward but the ocean was following them, the salt of that man's icy stare following her memory even as she tried to run away from it. Memory tugged at her as she whirled around, as her smile faltered for the briefest moment -- an unfamiliar face, an unfamiliar stature, but the Wolf was on alert, and curiosity was tugging at it's heart --- what a lie! It was tugging at both their hearts. Nostrils flaring, Rin took a few silent steps behind the stranger -- who was only four inches taller than she -- sniffing after him, feeling this vague recognition of the scent. Salty, like the ocean, his hair had a musty scent of the ocean; a thrill of fear that was quickly stifled.

So curious, as she followed slowly, at a distance, nose tilted up, looking rather comical for one so petite and slight, for that strange sort of expression that pulled at her lips. A half-smile, at once puzzled, intrigued and puzzled by her inability to place it. It reminded her of colder waters, of deeper waters (screaming, gurgling, unable to move, flailing, thrashing, but the water was merciless, the hand unmoving. Die, die, die, mongrel). Like ice, almost, wild in the way that rivers were not; salty, (obviously the smell of the ocean, but her mind kept teasing her, leading her along as she followed her feet unconsciously).

Yes, this scent, why did she --- she stuttered to a halt, cringing inwardly at the sudden memory of hard, indomitable eyes. Yes, that man, with his scent full of death and water, of ice so deep it burned when touched; salty, unbroken, but morbid. Just remembering it had her snorting out of her nose, trying to rid of the memory branded into the synapses of her brain. Why remember him now? -- she hadn't seen him since then, thank God, thank God. The thought of running into him made her uneasy, but the Wolf was less worried with her relationship with the nameless teacher. The Wolf recognized something of a dominant in the man, and had submitted with more grace than the girl would have given her credit for; to see the Wolf so tame had frightened and scarred her so deeply she had been avoiding class for several days now. The thought of running into him in the halls had sent her into such a tizzy, Rin had been forced to flee into the forest and hide out there for the night, losing herself to the trails, to the mud and the slick rainfall that night.

But that had been two days ago, and now, now, with the sun on her back and a measurable bit of courage shining through her heart, she couldn't quite stifle the scent of ocean on him -- and wondered if it had more to do with who he was, than that fact that he was damp. How could he stand to swim? Just thinking of anything deeper than the knee horrified Rin, made her flash back so forcefully, she was often paralyzed.

The boy whipped out a book, sat down and proceeded to read; Rin circled around wide, looking a little foolish but not caring as she came around to the opposite side of the tree, head tilted as if she were listening. Thump, thump, thump, the steady pulse of his heartbeat made her tongue writhe with delight, her eyes crinkling as the sound seemed to synchronize her own heart with his own -- sneaking around, she bent over slightly, peering at the book he was reading, "What're you reading?" she asked, head tilted in a wolfish way as her eyes lingered on his face, frank curiosity evident in the black irises. Subtly her nose flexed, scenting him, trying to figure out this delightful puzzle. One thing was for certain: she and the Wolf were in accord.

This boy was interesting.

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word count;; 771
tags;; Jay
OOC;; What a pest xD

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[Jayden Richardson]

The boy began to read, instantly becoming engrossed in the book at once, not noticing the Wolf girl had come up behind them. It was only when the girl asked him what he was reading that he looked up. The Otter within cursed himself for not noticing. He quickly looked at her eyes before smiling at her and showing her the cover. It was called ‘Greek Myths and Legends: The Truth’. It was a book that Jay had read before but he had wanted to read it again. The boy was a known bookworm that read books as if they were sponges, sometimes reading them again out of pure enjoyment.

Once he was sure he had allowed her to read the title, he offered her the book so that she could read the blurb. Maybe she was a lover of Greek Mythology, like he was. He then remembered his cards. He quickly got two out and held them up so that she could read them.

One reading:
Would you like me to move?

And the other one reading:

Hi, my name is Jayden but call me Jay. I'm mute.

He then put them back in his small brown bag, giving the girl a small smile. He heaved a silent sigh and held out his hand for the book back. He took a quick whiff and smelled a variety of smells. The main one was of forest, and of mud. In an unreadable expression, Jayden tilted his head to the side and narrowed his eyes, trying to smell out what sort of creature she was. She wouldn’t be here if she wasn’t a shifter. It was Jayden’s curiosity that made him want to circle her. He wanted to know what she was. See, he was compiling a database of who was what animal on his laptop, and he actually found it quite interesting.

He went back to his original position and sat back down, still perplexed. He was tempted to ask her what animal she was. But he then remembered her wolfish tilted head. Was she a wolf? He’d wait and see. So far, the Otter was having mixed feelings towards the newcomer: curiosity, wariness and friendliness. He quelled the Otter for the moment, wishing to find out for himself if she was friend or foe.

Jayden then gave a smile, not knowing what else to do. He doubted that she knew Sign Language and he wondered if she’d be patient enough to allow him to repeatedly show her cards. He gave a small silent gloomy sigh, a look of gloominess passed his face before being replaced with the same unreadable expression.

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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She couldn't place it, didn't quite understand what the draw was; why was she still here? Why did she even speak? Both she and the Wolf were perplexed by this need to speak, by this need to sniff around and find out the answer to a question they didn't even know, let alone ask. What was the mystery -- this scent of ocean, this heavy musk of damp fur. He reminded her of someone else, someone taller, wider, icier. There was a frightening shadow lingering over the scent in her nose, tingling up the line of her nasal passages and imprinting themselves in her mental memory.

Lines blurred, the world paused, but it was still the same, these two very different scents, yet one inextricably led to the next. Without one, she wouldn't have recognized the second. What was this need to identify that intimidating effigy of her nightmares? She remembered clearly why she had run, remembered each moment of heart-wrenching trepidation. Rin had been scared of herself: of the way her body was reacting to his presence, melting, melting, submitting to his equally pitiless stare, more powerful than the Wolf. Omnipotent, arrogant, there was a barrier between them, not only in her dreams, but she was too shy to go look for him, to search for him through the halls and the classrooms. Instead she knotted the emotions up tight in her heart and let the heat wash over her, let it soak into her nervous system and wash it all away. Peace, peace, it was all she ever wanted -- silence to think, silence to exist, and yet what was going to happen when she turned her attention to him?

Would he be looking at her funny, or would he smile, too? Perhaps he didn't know smiles were as deadly as frowns.

Rin bent down a little more, her hair tumbling over the narrow corner of her shoulder as her wolf-tilted eyes regarded the book he hefted up for her inspection; the idea of touching it was revolting, but she was trying to make an effort, realizing even if it made her sick, that she had to take the step. Without the step, wouldn't he hate her too? Wouldn't he view her as a monster that needed caging? Heart stumbling, Rin took the book in her hand, flipping through it noncommittally, a rather disinterested look cross her face -- she sniffed the pages, intrigued by the scent of his fingers on each page. It was drenched with it, and she inhaled it without thinking, uncaring of how feral she appeared.

When she looked up, she blinked a little, wary -- muscles tensing as if she were on her toes to flee; he was moving too quickly for her heart to adjust, and it annoyed her greatly that she was strung-out. Calm, the Wolf thinks, snapping it's jaws with delicious mischief, easing forward, forward, even as the cards flashed up and she skimmed it: Would you like me to move? Hi, my name is Jayden but call me Jay. I'm mute.

Lip twisting in an amused sneer, Rin plopped down next to him, tilting her head in that frank way she had, blunt and a little too honest as she grinned, "You a push-over?" her eyes slid over him critically as he retried the book. Surprised by the sniff, she felt a swell of appreciation warming her expression, a quick brightening of shining light before it was dimmed by his actions -- circling her as if she were prey; the Wolf's hackles rose, and with it, it's growl thrummed from between Rin's obviously human lips.

Yet the growl was real, and a warning, though she refused to budge as he circled, as he came back to his spot. "I don't like games," she murmured, taking her long hair in her fingers and deftly braiding the ends without looking, an unconscious gesture that soothed her. What a liar, to say she didn't like games; the truth, she didn't like outsiders, and that's what he was right now, with his judgmental stare, looking her over when he was the one that must be judged. No one judges the Wolf, for the Wolf is supreme; she smiles, a nasty little smile as she turns her eyes toward him again, a dark spark of amusement warming the endlessness perceived there. She stretched out slightly, muddy socks tucked under her as she leaned against the tree, and rolled her face slightly in his direction. "So I guess you don't talk much, huh? Can't blame you, I wouldn't want to go through the effort of trying to talk to other people. Seems like a waste of time for the most part." the Wolf panted laughter, an echo of sunlight in her heart and mind. Light-hearted if slightly cruel for her judgments, Rin was at once steady and unpredictable, quickly falling into whimsical fancy the longer she remained. "So. You gunna tell me why you," she leaned in and sniffed near his shoulder, brows wrinkling slightly, "smell the way you do?"

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word count;; 846
tags;; Jay
OOC;; She's not a naturally talkative person, so she's trying. Kinda interesting.

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[Jayden Richardson]

This girl was the most interesting person he had met since coming here. First she sniffs the book, then she growls a warning, which the Otter obeyed by sitting back down and now she just asked him why he smelled the way he did. Confused, the boy smelled himself and realised what she meant now. He smelled of salty water. He smiled at her and got something out of his bag. It was an otter necklace, which he had got last year. He decided to put it on. Maybe that would make her understand the salty water smell.

He then tried to find a card, wanting to know what her animal was. He found and held it out for her to read.

And what about you? You smell of the forest.

The Otter was sensing her unpredictably and warned the boy, who took it into account. He sensed it too. The funny thing about having no voice was the fact that your other senses became heightened. The boy tiled his head to right again, with the same unreadable expression as before. He then had an idea. He got out another card out, before the first card back.

Do you know Sign Language? Because if you want, I can teach you.

He decided to wait for her answer. She seemed....unpredictable. She had been ok a moment ago, before he had circled round her. She obviously hadn’t liked being circled, judged. Both the Otter and Jayden thought that she’d make a great friend and ally. An otter couldn’t have too many friends. Hopefully they would become friends, she seemed nice enough, though he realised she seemed....unstable, and that didn’t frighten him in the least. The Otter, on the other hand was becoming more wary. The boy reassured the Otter that they’d be fine. If the girl tried anything then they’d attack. For now though, he’d be friendly and civil. After all, she hadn’t done anything to cause harm. The growl had been a warning. In which case, the Otter boy would have to be careful around this girl.

Not knowing what else to do, the boy allowed an audible silence to pass. Next, he decided to show her something. He brought out clear crystal model of an otter. His older sister, Naomi had bought it for him before he had come here. It was one of his prized possessions, as it had a message on the bottom.

To my dearest Jayden,
Know that I love you very much, and if you ever feel sad or lonely then you need only to look at this and think of me. Good luck at school.
Your loving sister, Naomi xxx

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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What similarity was there but that vague scent of deep ocean waters? Nothing, nothing at all, but it was enough to intrigue the Wolf, and the girl, who had very little on her mind but that encounter, but the oncoming loneliness of being separated from her pack. In the Wolf's mind, they were exiled, and it meant everyone was an enemy, every other creature that could bare it's fangs at her was a threat to be extinguished -- yet there was something here, a camaraderie that could be reached if they just moved a little closer, if those fingertips could just press beyond the glass of the barrier between them. They were from different worlds, completely different families -- how similar could he be to her?

Yet the Wolf sensed him, knew his other half for what it was: strong. He wasn't like others in this school, who denied their other half, but one who not only embraced it, but listened to it. There was a strength in that solemnity, that watchfulness. He didn't attack, but there was a contained violence that was twisted in his muscles, and the Wolf approved. With the Wolf at ease, the girl, Rin, was more than willing to relax. She was the knife that stuck in her heart, fixing the compass of her emotions. Where the Wolf led, was safety, and she trusted the beast implicitly, even as it feared and awed her -- she was a wild animal, when it came down to it, not some domesticated pet at her beck and call. The Wolf had emotion, had thoughts, and a sense of what was right and wrong -- that it differed from humanity was just a matter of course. No, she would not stand to be judged, cornered and run; she was a predator, it wasn't in her to run from anything but herself. Yet he was proving himself wise, and it warmed Rin's expression.

What were words between creatures that communicated soundlessly -- so when others might have been put off by his voicelessness, Rin was quite the opposite. It attracted her, made her feel a little more at ease: could he really interrogate her if he couldn't speak? He was steadiness, where she was steadily whimsical, and with this delightful little excursion warming her, fanning outward, Rin was tilted her head, fingers still playing with the ends of her hair as he lifted up the cards.

She leaned over a little, reading it, a mischievous sort of smile curling the edges of her petite lips; delight sparked through her eyes. And what about you? You smell of the forest. Rin nodded, approval warming the black irises, turning them into obsidian gems t hat seemed to dance with inner glee. A secret seemed just out of reach, one that she would normally keep hidden -- but he was so frank with his questions, she couldn't help but reciprocate. She laughed a little, the Wolf snuffling about in her heart as she leaned back, "Do I? That's great, really." she lifts up her arm and sniffs at it as if she could smell her own scent; regardless of her capabilities, she was charmed by the question, looking more child-like and at ease. "Wolf." she says, sing-song, an echo of her singing talent making the strung out word melodic and even a touch uncanny.

Eyes sliding to the side, she opened her mouth to say something when he held up another card; lip caught in her teeth thoughtfully, she read, Do you know Sign Language? Because if you want, I can teach you. -- and regarded him. She stilled for a moment, thinking, wondering what course of action she should take -- should she learn? Or try to? Or would she get frustrated and strike out at him; mirth flickered over the coals in her eyes, a dark fire of challenge igniting there, inciting the Wolf's indomitable personality. The Wolf savored challenges. "Sure," so whimsical, so thoughtlessly she agrees without thinking about how hard it might be for someone who constantly loved to be on the move. To sit still and learn? She barely attended her classes! She breathed a laugh, knees drawn up to her chest as she props her chin on them, "But don't get mad if I do it badly." more of a warning than anything else. It was unlikely she'd excel at this, but hell, why the fuck not, right?

Grinning, she reached out and took the thing he offered, "Otter huh. Guess that explains that." turning it over, glimpsing the little note, Rin froze, muscles tensed even in the position she sat. A wave of sadness crashed against her, much like the waves that he must love. "Family loves you, huh?" So sorrowful her voice, suddenly dropping down, sounding more delicate, vulnerable. Too much to hope for, she thinks, her mind reaching out unconsciously for a home she missed, even though they treated her like a monster, even though they feared her, and wished her gone. Taro...

This time, only the girl grieves.

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word count;; 846
tags;; Jay
OOC;; heh, they're kinda cute together lol

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[Jayden Richardson]

Ah, so she was a wolf then, nice! A strong animal that was capable of hunting his kind if they wanted to. The girl seemed to be more relaxed, and even said her animal in a sing-song voice, which probably show to people often. This was an unusual friendship pairing – a Wolf and an Otter. Then again, Jayden’s other friends were unusual in themselves: a chipmunk and a mouse. In his Jayden’s mind, any animal could get on well with each other – just depended on the person.

So, it seemed that the Wolf and the Otter had become friends, and it hadn’t seemed to take that long either – a bonus in Jay’s mind. The Otter sensed the Wolf’s approval in them and welcomed it. He would try to live up to the Wolf’s standards. He wondered what she liked to do in her spare time – the girl, not the Wolf, of course, but the Otter could always ask the Wolf too...somehow.

He then remembered that she hadn’t told him her name and was going to ask her what it was but then she said something that made Jayden sad. She had seen the message. He looked at her briefly and nodded. He got a card and held a look of sadness on the young-looking face.

I'm sorry if I upset you, I had no intention of doing such a thing. I can leave if you wish. Also, what is your name?

Damn that stupid message! The one time it seemed to be a problem. This then brought about a series about the girl, such as, what had happened in her past? How had her shifting come about? And many other questions that he wished to be answered but the Otter silenced him for the minute. The girl was grieving over something that probably was in the past but had hit home when she had seen the message. He was tempted to ask but once again the Otter silenced him, recognising that the girl was grieving. Once he was sure the girl had read the card, he put the card back inside the bag. He was truly sorry for showing her the model and for one bizarre moment, wanted to hug her but didn’t think that the Wolf would approve. He saw the model still in her hands and gently took it from her, smiling apologetically as he did so, trying to convey how sorry he really was.

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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[/CENTER]

She was so different from others; her need had developed into a form of dependency -- her identity washed away by the pure power the Wolf represented. There was nothing but the Wolf in her heart, nothing much left of the girl but the memories of a life before, before death and blood had come to open itself before fang and claw. Before family had turned their eyes away from their daughter, their sister, their cousin -- Rin existed in the past, a shadow of a lost self flickering between the shadows of consciousness, a blur in the corner of her eyes waving, waving -- as it continually faded.

Her heart was a stone, untouched by light until the Wolf ignited it with her passions, a feeble young girl in comparison, weak, where the Wolf was strong. But the strength of her convictions were more than Rin could ever imagine. Her yearning and the power of her desires were palpable, and she did not know, quite yet, could not possibly know that her emotions had become the Wolf's as well. It was a give and take so forceful, so clashing, it was impossible to extricate the Wolf from the girl, the girl from the Wolf. Where others were simply two, she was a struggling monstrosity of one. They fought for the body, but were also influenced by each other. When the girl grieved over things that could not be changed, the wolf could do nothing but watch in silence, still into ether. The girl grieved for a time when she could open her eyes and be loved, before rejection had made it's scar on her heart; but there was so such place back there, no place for her in their family, in their household.

Nothing, nothing -- she was a tide that kept receding, never to come back, pulled by the moon, called by the sorrow in her heart. Family was important to her, they were the safety, the dream, the wretched black pain that tore her heart into pieces; Packs were important.... but hers had abandoned her and without it, she was a solitary beast, lashing out, calling out for someone stronger to harness her potential, to see in her something good, and not bad.

Eyes sliding to the side, those dark sad eyes regarded the silent boy, took in the locks of blond hair, the scope of her cheeks, his jaws, his shoulders. He was sturdy, he was reliable -- when the world had taken his voice, he had carved a new path for himself, found a new way to live that did not hamper him. He grew up in love, in confidence, and though the Wolf was a predator, so was the Otter; mutual respect softened her lips, made her smile past the pain as the Wolf lifted it's head, seemed to fill the girl to the very brim. A monster, to some, beautiful goddess to her -- but it was truly a wild thing which peered out from the dark recessed of pupil and iris, which seemed to darken even the sharp black of her eyes. Grief was inescapable and the pain had become her companion -- Think of the sun. Of the run. -- and the Wolf's voice fills her heart, wordless but exchanged through a flood of foreign emotion, alien strength making her heart beat, beat, beat, steadier, firmer, glorifying in life. Don't give up, yet, we're not finished -- the emotions seemed to say, and Rin found a smile on her lips, tenderly changing her face into a delicate visage of fresh beauty.

I'm sorry if I upset you, I had no intention of doing such a thing. I can leave if you wish. Also, what is your name?

Her eyes tracked the words, tracked his hand as he gently took the otter from her hand, tenderness turning to wistfulness. Kindness was a weakness when dealing with outsiders, but the lines were blurring with her desperation to hold something real to her chest. The need to bury her fingers in something other than blankets suffocating her, making her act in ways that she would never have acted before. Rin was losing strength, losing logic as the days went by, her nature becoming turbulent, unpredictable. The slightest thing set her off. But this? This gentle surprise, this steady regard? She eased under his concern, waving it away, "Don't go. It's good that you have such a nice family, isn't it? You have something to go back to." and she smiles, leaning her head back against the tree, her hair tumbled over shoulders, nearly touching the floor with it's length. The Wolf receded, curling up tight around the girl's heart as she grinned, "Guess I didn't tell you, huh? Sayuri is my name, but I've been called Rin for years now. Nice to meet you Jayden." and she reaches her hand out to shake his, looking once again light-hearted, basking under the warmth of the sun. Taro... but her brother's face is banished by the Wolf's snarl, and Rin turns a sparkling gaze full of mischief back to Jay. "Do you always just sit around here reading?"

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word count;; 861
tags;; Jay
OOC;; skidoosh!

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[Jayden Richardson]

"Don't go. It's good that you have such a nice family, isn't it? You have something to go back to."

Jayden smiled at the Wolf girl. So, it was something to do her past. Well, whatever it was, if she wanted to talk about it, she could but Jay wouldn’t pry as it obviously think about, let alone speak about, though the Otter’s interest was piqued. Jay quelled the Otter into silence and heard Rin’s next statement. Sayuri was a beautiful name – why would she have been called Rin instead? Ah well, different people’s preferences Jayden thought. He knew that some people preferred being called by their nickname to their birth name, even in class. It wasn’t a bad thing, per say, just different people’s preferences.

He then happily shook Rin’s hand, glad that she had wanted to befriend him, smiling as he did so. So here Jayden and the Otter were, talking to a new friend, Rin and the Wolf. When asked if he always just sat here reading, Jayden silently chuckled and shook his head. He looked in his bag to see if he had any cards that could answer that question. When he couldn’t find any, he silently huffed in annoyance. He’d have to write some more and go to the library and laminate them later. For now though, Jay looked through his other bag and found a spare card and a pen. He then scribbled a little message, checked it to make sure it made sense and then showed Rin.

No, I go swimming in my Otter form a lot. I also talk to my friends and family too. But I mostly just read, write stuff and watch DVD’s, oh, and listen to music. How about you, what do you do in your spare time?

Jayden always liked to know what other people liked doing in their spare time. He didn’t know why but he just found it fascinating what different people did in their spare time. Jayden was a people person and he was an observer – through choice and force – and so was able to pick up on the little things that people did like, for example, he noticed that one person always fidgeted when they were nervous or that someone else always coughed when they were lying. It was just a habit that Jayden had picked up since he didn’t have a voice and he needed something to do other than read, write, school work, listen to music and watch DVD’s.

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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Acceptance was such a small thing to give -- a little smile, a hand outstretched in meeting. It didn't take much to look at something, to listen to them; it didn't take much at all. So how this delicate young girl managed to go days and months, even years without that acceptance, without finding it anyone, is at once impressive and saddening. Friends, home, family -- these things are what she holds most precious, basing her life around the wolfish dynamic of pack and importance.

In a pack, she is not alone, but surrounded, warmth more than just a physicality -- it was an emotional support, as everyone picked you up as you fell, as you picked up your sister, your brother, your friend, your lover. It was a give, give, give, with nothing of taking. It was precious, it was perfect -- and she couldn't find it. Already family oriented, the young girl had not been completely brain washed by the Wolf's appearance, but this lacking in her life had strung her out, had forced her to react in terrible, feral ways. Yet here, with this silent, interesting boy, she found herself considering him, regarding him in a softer light. No longer an outsider, no, no, but forming ties that would last as long as he lived, as long as she breathed. Protector, friend, pack mate, she was starting to feel her heart unwind around her, her guard crumbling to dust at her feet. It didn't matter if he agreed, if he even liked her to -- to Rin, who saw something beautiful and expressive in his quiet compassion, it was worth it. It was worth linking herself to him, to watching him.

It was impossible to not like Jayden, and it was a trait she both admired and envied. Her lips quirking as frustration burned the air, she leaned over slightly as he scribbled on a piece of paper; unconsciously she traced the rhythm of his writing, how each letter sounded the same, how spaces filled in a silence that added to music. Yes, music, yes, singing.

No, I go swimming in my Otter form a lot. I also talk to my friends and family too. But I mostly just read, write stuff and watch DVD’s, oh, and listen to music. How about you, what do you do in your spare time?

Her hand darted out, grabbing the piece of paper and bringing it closer as she skimmed it; as a smile suddenly burst forth on her lips, making her look spectacularly young and naive. These masks were all parts of her heart, all parts of what it was to be Rin. Feral and wild, perhaps, but young and naive -- lashing out simply because she could, in that childish way. It was what it meant to be a wolf. Almost grinning, she swung around, her legs tucking under her Indian-style, facing him as she leaned forward slightly. "I run." how to describe it though? How to convey this exciting pulsation that began in her ears and slithered down her spine. Restlessness made her itch, but she didn't fidget, that bright-eyed delight still intensely in her black gaze. "It's like flying, except you're on the ground, of course." how to tell him, to make him understand it wasn't just running -- it was freedom -- it was bursting free of these tight schedules, of discarding human norms and being just herself. What no one truly understand about Rin: the Wolf was too much a part of her, their likes and dislikes almost identical, their desires and discomfort running parallel through their hearts and minds. Where Rin ended, the Wolf began, seamless and perfect. Except for the control... except for some of the darker urges. Rin blinked a little, brushing away those train of thoughts, that smile still hovering over her mouth. "And I sing, though I'm a little embarrassed." her hand came up self-consciously, tangling in her hair as she ducked her gaze a little. "I sing in front of my teacher, but that's because he frightens me. I usually just sing alone, though." She laughed, though, rocking back slightly as she added, "Then again, it is my major, so I guess I can't complain, right?"

Tucking her wild hair behind her ears, she tilted her head inquiringly, "How do you say 'music' in sign language? 'Singing' 'Running'" The list could go on and on as she started to realize these words she wanted to know. It was a new territory, and though restlessness was too much in her nature to let her sit and study, a little bit at a time to satiate her curiosity wouldn't do any harm. "What are you majoring in?" a grin, cheeky and teasing, "Swimming?"

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word count;; 794
tags;; JayJay
OOC;; hah, she's getting talkative now xD

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[Jayden Richardson]

Jayden smiled when Rin mentioned that she ran. Well, she was a wolf so it was natural for her to run and feel free. It was the same with Jay and swimming. He didn’t understand why people were so...not afraid but wary of their animal counterparts. These students were shifters – animal shifters – if they were ever going to learn how to listen to the animal within they needed to start opening up and trusting their animals. Jayden thought that the school would be much cooler it the students and staff listened to their animal within, even those whose animals were insects or reptiles. Sure, their brains weren’t exactly intelligent – well, that was Jay’s assumption – the students and staff who had those sorts of animals should still pay attention to them. Jay was sure that they’d be surprised about what they would learn.

Jayden held out hands and signed, <<No, I understand>> but he realised that Rin wouldn’t be able to understand. A look of sadness flashed across his face. He so wished that people with the innate ability to sign. It would make things so much easier. He looked away, sadness welling up inside of him before he heard Rin’s question. His face brightened when he heard it. He fidgeted before he was comfortable and beamed at Rin. Next, he silently cleared his throat and got a card out and held it out to show Rin before shoving it back in his bag.

No, I understand perfectly

He then got another card and showed Rin before that one back in the bag.

I’ll show the sign for all of them. It’d be good practice for you anyway.

Jayden smiled at Rin and signed very slowly so that she’d get it. Both the Otter and Jayden sensed that the Wolf and Rin weren’t very patient – it was just a hunch. Wow, Jayden was becoming quite the teacher. He was teaching Roxxi, Allie and now Rin. He noticed that all his “students” were girls but no doubt he’d get a male student or two soon. Zach knew Sign Language so Jay didn’t worry about him so much. Zach was like a brother to Jay and although the mute boy thought that Zach was hot, he’d never do anything with him because Zach was straight and Jay just viewed him as a brother figure – nothing more. he then began to sign. He signed all the ones that Rin had asked.

He then got a card out in answer to her question about what he was majoring in.


Mythology

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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She was conflictual, she was controversy -- while she ran straight forward her eyes always looking ahead, always yearning for the next corner, the next little bend that will bring her to newer heights, Rin, at heart was a simplistically complex person. In the end, all she ever wanted was to be accepted, to have her own place t run when things got too hot for her, when things boiled under her feet and forced her down onto her knees. It was more than the Wolf; Rin wanted family, she wanted people she could rely on, wanted people who would rely on her.

In Jay, she might've found one, at last, at last; her smile was lighthearted, her eyes easy when she met his. There was no controversy now, no hesitancy now -- it was simple, this talking, this existing beside him. He was a good person, at heart, and she knew this; the wolf knew it. Without wondering, without words, she sensed in his heart only the need to reach out as well -- the need to hold onto things, and to be incessantly himself. It was refreshing, this mirror of herself in another's form. To know that not everything was a problem, that it was alright, it was perfectly fine for her want to be with someone else. He didn't remind her of home, didn't remind her of anything, and it was a perfectly peaceful moment.

Quite the contrary to other meet ups where anger had flared, where fur had risen and hackles stiffened -- where eyes had flashed and she had provoked others, Jayden was simple; Jayden looked at her, spoke to her without any hidden agenda -- he was simply bored, and looking for company. She smiled, suddenly, mimicking his hand motions, wondering if there was any way she could possibly remember them later. Did it really matter? Right now, with her and him, with them together, she was having fun, she was giving over to the human side of herself, instead of the Wolf, becoming more Rin with each breath she took. Her fingers danced alongside his -- mimicry was something she was pretty good at. It didn't take long before she was able to get a handle on the angle of her fingers, on the way the arm must be held -- delighting in this little puzzle, her eyes were vibrant with it, her tongue becoming looser as she spoke what she did, over and over until she was satisfied. It was fun, in a way, to be able to simply... do something, for no reason at all.

The Wolf snorted, it's ears flicking up as it took note of the time.

When Rin read Mythology, her eyes flicked back up to him -- it made sense, considering what it was he had been reading. Her smile was quicker this time, her humor bubbling up to the surface as she rocked backward, her hands tangling up in her ankles as she anchored herself; her hair swept backward -- eyes alight with that easiness and peacefulness she had always searched for. Jay truly was someone amazing, though perhaps not enough people told him. He spoke to anyone, was kind to everyone, drawing them into the circle of his charisma. Rin opened her mouth to say something when she suddenly flinched, the bell going off.

Habit, routine; though she detested all of these things, it was time for her to leave. Her disappointment curled about the edges of her lashes, drawing her smile downward as she looked over at the entrance to the school hallways. Time to go. she thinks, but the Wolf, restless and energetic, merely snorted. Time to see Mura -- and the excitement was quickly rallying against this parting. "I have to go. I'll see you around right?" she rocks forward again, taking the pencil he had been using and scribbling her number down on the extra piece of paper he had used before. She smiled, quick and disarming as she bounced to her feet as if she was simply flying from the ground. Waving, she hopped forward a little and darted in between people, away, away -- toward Murazar, toward another pinpoint of light. Toward someone who reminded her of home, without those vicious memories of pain and alienation.

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word count;; 719
tags;; Jay
OOC;; Endgame ;3 Feel free to post once more if you'd like.

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