Books Can Release Stress Too || Natsumi Sayuri

[Luke Bowers]

[Seriously, no yahtzee here, lol. It's a struggle without it!]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

The library was quiet. It was quiet every single time he visited. Luke never actually read a book when he went in. Besides that, he hardly looked like the type of person who would go to a library in the first place. The librarian had been staring him down ever since he entered. He didn’t even mean to go in there in the first place. His hand gripped his cell phone tightly in utter frustration. It had been years since the day he first shifted. Years. Yet he still could not accept the excuse they threw on him every time. Most people would probably think it was childish for him to care. Or at least for him to still care. Even some of those at the school who had been shifting for years like he did didn’t take it lightly.

His family had never been the loving type. Not like most families should be, but at least he could say they weren’t abusive. Just the usual “We expect a lot out of you, so you aren’t going to get any sympathy from us.” That’s why he didn’t buy the same old “We did it to protect you” crap they tossed at him all the time. They shipped him off there because they didn’t want to deal with it. They didn’t want to help him. Maybe in the end family was nothing. Then again, they fed him and put a roof over his head. Maybe he should just be grateful for that much.

”Stop right there, young man.”

Then there was the current situation. Luke’s hand was still gripping his phone tightly as he walked down the isles of books. He was picking up books, pretending to read the titles and then letting them fall to the floor. Luckily they weren’t getting damaged, but the librarian was furious. Not once had he looked up at her, but he could imagine the look on her face: red face, jaws tensed up, eyes staring him down. He was probably acting a little childish giving the circumstances. Luke ran his fingers over a book and pulled it out just a little and then picked it up.

”Don’t make me call the cops.”

The cops? Were there even cops on the island? He had never seen any, but looked up at her anyways. Her expression was just about the same way he had pictured it in his head. She was very tensed up, to say the least. He looked back down at the book in his hands and then put it back on the shelf.

“Fine. You win.”

What she was winning, he didn’t know. He didn’t hate books. Not that he was a fan of them either, but he probably shouldn’t take his frustration out on them. His eyes looked down at the floor where the books had started piling up, almost in a straight line from one end to the other. Luke looked down to his cell phone where his hand was still suffocating it and finally put it into his pocket.

“Now apologize.”

He jerked his head up at her. “Apologize for what?”

”For throwing books on the floor and nearly ruining them.”

Luke scowled under his breath. “Throwing” wasn’t exactly the word for it. Actually, all he had done was drop them onto the floor. Also, as she had said, he nearly ruined them, but they were in fact okay. Not ruined at all. He sighed and nodded his head slightly. Maybe he had overreacted after all. He was eighteen years old and should probably know better, but he hated when his family lied to him. They weren’t ever supposed to keep secrets from each other. He never had and suddenly he found out they had kept one from him. Not something small, but something big. The Jaguar in him was quite calm, though.

“I’m sorry,” he said, barely louder than a whisper.

”What was that?”

“I said I’m sorry, okay?” This he said louder than before. “I overreacted just a little.”

The librarian raised her eyebrows, probably because he said he only overreacted a little bit. In her eyes, treating books like that was probably a very serious crime. But it wasn’t as if she knew the whole story, nor did she probably care either. She appeared to be thinking, but smiled after a moment.

”Since you’re so sorry, how about you clean up this mess? She crossed her arms and turned back as she started to leave.” Don’t think about leaving until you do.”

He rolled his eyes as she went back to her desk and watched as she sat down. She would still be watching him, he knew that much. Luke picked up the nearest book and looked for the number it should go behind.

“So stupid, Luke. Why did you end up here of all places?”

tagged , Rin
words , 808
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , As I tell everyone, we can move the thread elsewhere anytime. I don't care.
credit , rora @ hos

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[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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The rain fell like a balm on her skin, pulsing, living as it hid her tears; as it slid down her skin, caressing the hot fury of her sorrow with it's cold, icy kisses. Fingers slid through her hair -- cold, burning through the heat of her emotions -- rain slipping over the curve of her skull, dampening her hair to plaster to her face. She could not move, did not move -- it was too painful, the idea of living, the idea of existing in this horror anymore. Terrified of stepping forward, to proud to take a step back, the girl remained in motionlessness, feeling her heart seizing up in her chest, squirming in pain, in the agony that only love, only heart break could bring.

What was this sorrow but an extension of her fierce loyalty? The Wolf only understood the fury, disquieted by the depth of Rin's despair. Intertwined, they moved as one -- her fingers reached up, up, touching her cold face, fingers closing, clenching, and the Wolf flooded through her arms, through her nails, liquid heat combating the very cold Rin called to her chest. Loneliness suffocated her, and the Wolf danced circles around her heart, making it pump, making it bleed to heal cleanly. This is just the beginning -- that wordless confidence slipping out from between it's jaws in a crooning whisper of tenderness. It was a cruel existence the Wolf must lead. The girl must become stronger to face this newest challenge, to face this oncoming sorrow that hovered just out of reach, choking her, annihilating her. It can't be true, she thinks, her eyes fluttering closed, chin tilting back as the sky shifted and churned, as the clouds seemed to eat themselves; they cried, as she cried, her tears slipping over her cheeks, puffing up the beautifully simplistic curves of her face.

How long has she been outside while the rain beat away at her heart? How long had she remained, her mouth half-opened drinking in this sorrow, this pain, feeling it fester deeper than the bone. What was this world, that denied her everything? Fierce anger struggled against the inevitability of her despair -- a battle fought, scars bleeding red, bleeding true within her ribs. Every motion made her think of him -- every little scent that trickled into her nose, she associated with cold and salt, with the death that lingered in the crevices of his heartless gaze. Family? How could he be family, when she wanted more? When she wanted to be something better --- when...when there was another scent lingering over his clothes. Woman. Wolf.

Invader -- the Wolf snarls, but the girl is crumpling, unable to bear the pain. She clutches at her chest as her knees buckle, as she ducks her head to keep herself from screaming. What was she in comparison to someone like her -- someone who thought instead of felt, who calculated and puzzled? This woman would solve his problems...and Rin could only feel them. Grounding her teeth, she hid under the large mane of her hair, shivering as the cold finally penetrated the surface. Run, the Wolf cries out, trying to draw the girl out -- but the despair is too thick. Run? For once Rin thinks she cannot escape this with physical exertion. This time the Wolf is no help. This time... she is utterly alone.

Rin walks though the rain is slipping it's fingers under her skin, though her eyes are a sad mixture of red and black. Without thinking, without knowing, she follows her feet, slips in through the side entrance of the library, the blast of dryness sucking at her skin; Rin pulls her hair back, twisting the water out of it as she weaves between tables, between aisles, her fingers reaching out for the place she had met him. Closer than friend, closer than brother; he was pack, to her. And yet... he was unreachable, now. Her sight blurred as she leaned against the shelf, as she felt the ubiquitous darkness of her shadowy self expanding, swallowing all the goodness left in her. What was that?

[/i] -- not words, but a sound bending around in a lyrical dance; I said I'm sorry, okay? I overreacted just a little. -- music, becoming language, filtering, translating. Since you're so sorry how about you clean up this mess? Don't think about leaving until you do. -- anger flaring up. The Wolf, catching the tide of this uprising emotion, this sudden flair of defiance, fed it with her fire, with her strength, with the fierce conviction of her love and devotion Let's be wild, the Wolf howls in her head, echoing through the fog of her pain. Break away from this.

So stupid, Luke. Why did you end up here of all places?[/i]

Her lips quirked, head tilting upward as she sidestepped, peering around the edge to watch him, her nose working as she took in his scent. Yes, away from that darkness. Away from that sorrow. She smiles, but it is a painful thing to see -- nothing happy about it, nothing beautiful about it as her dark eyes take him in, as she leans her face against the curve of the shelf. Forget the other, forget the dead fox in human skin. Forget the wolf which prances around him. What were they to her? Rin ignores the sting that slithers through her defenses; she ignores the whispered everything that swarms up her spine. "Stupid Luke," she says mimicking, trying to capture that fire, trying to get a hold of that laughter, that heat, that intensity that was impossibly Rin. "Why do what she says?" Her eyes, black in the midst of all that paleness, seem to speak without words -- all of her emotions dancing without guile from one corner to the next. Yes, grab onto that warmth, that freedom. Become yourself again, away from this sorrow, from this sickness. Away from this death -- become Rin again. "Afraid of the big bad --" she tilts slightly looking around him toward the woman, her nose wrinkling a little, "smells like a skunk to me."
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word count;; 1025
tags;; Luke ^-^
OOC;; Excitement. (ahh...didn't proof read >__>)

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[Luke Bowers]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

Adults. Always thinking they could boss everyone around. Especially those they deemed as “kids.” Yes, they thrived off of that ability. Of that supposable “right” they had. It was ridiculous in Luke’s mind. Some of them were real hypocrites in that sense too. It was not okay for a kid/teenager/whatever they saw them as to get mad or break the rules. No. If an adult got mad over something, it was perfectly okay in their eyes. Especially if it was happening to them.

This just sucks.

Luke had gotten into trouble several times since he had been there. One time he purposely turned himself in, just to do it. He tried to deny it, but he was afraid in a sense. Was it possible for someone to get kicked out of the school for doing too many things wrong? After all, where were they supposed to go? Of course in his grade, it was about that time anyways. So they probably wouldn’t hesitate to kick him out. He could feel the Jaguar in him. Almost as if it were pacing back and forth; anxious. Oh no, he didn’t like taking orders from anybody either. If he did, maybe he wouldn’t be so territorial. Luke picked up another book and placed it onto the shelf. Maybe he should just leave and forget about doing what she says. Did he really want to limit the places he could go, though? Even if he wasn’t that big of a fan of the library.

”Stupid Luke.”

He quickly turned his head towards the voice, annoyed. She was drenched in water, so he could only assume she had been outside in the rain. That was probably the place he should be – not here, in a library. He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped when she spoke again. Even he questioned why he should do as she said. He kept his gaze on her as he bent down and picked up another book. The Jaguar in him was a little restless; it had picked up her shift. A wolf. Luke didn’t know how much of a threat a wolf was to a Jaguar, but the real question was how much of a threat she was to him in human form.

"Afraid of the big bad --smells like a skunk to me."

“I’m not afraid,” he told her, annoyed. Did he seem afraid? Or did she just want to get him angry?

”Shh!”

Luke turned towards the librarian. The same one who had been over there before was now telling him to be quiet. He had figured it out. Since he was actually listening to what she had told him to do, then she thought that gave her an even more reason to order him around. One thing always leads to another. But she was wrong. He gripped the book tighter. He was also aware that lately he had become angrier. Normally he was not that bad, but if he was careful, he wouldn’t be able to say that anymore. He would have to start saying that being angry was normal, but it used to be different.

“Don’t tell me to be quiet and spare her,” he told her in a frustrated voice, pushing the book in his hand onto the shelf. He didn’t bother to see if It was in the correct place or not. He no longer cared if it was. She hadn’t even told him to put them back in the right place. If he had really wanted to be smart, he could have thrown them away, since she told him to clean up his mess.

He was quite aware that he was the one speaking really loud. Even though his theory might have been correct, it was usually a librarians job to keep it more quiet than not. But it wasn’t as if there were many people in there anyways. What was the point? He was aware she was probably glaring at him again – or at least in his direction. After placing another book onto the shelf, he took a deep breath and looked back at the girl.

“I have no clue why I'm listening to her, if you really want to know.”

tagged , Rin
words , 703
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , Sorry, changed it around sort of. Here's the "code" so to speak: "What I say," What I think and emphasize on words. Other people
credit , rora @ hos

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[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

[/SIZE]
[/CENTER]

This was addiction; she pulled it to her, inhaling the scent of irritation, the scent of pulsing anger just under the surface, simmering, rising, begging to be free. A little poke, a delicate claw slipping out of her fingers as she broke free his skin, as his pulse leapt onto her tongue. Yes, yes, these were the thoughts that were entirely Rin. These inhuman desires which made her so uniquely herself; the Wolf licked it's lips becoming whole again, ignoring the pain of that scent, the pain of that afternoon. There was no point in remembering, when the heavy knowledge was poisonous sludge sloshing around her brain. Intoxicate me she thinks, looking like a druggie about to get her hit; the ecstasy just within reach if she had the determination to reach out and grab it.

And she does, make no mistake -- she is a blessedly selfish creature, holding the fiery scents of cat and librarian -- of the dust of inanimate books. She holds life in her brain, inhaling softly, pulsing, living, enticing. Yes, live; forget the pain. Become yourself again, build yourself up again with each draw of the hit to your lips, with each step you take that's closer to the plummet, closer to the prestige of the Wolf. The Wilderness lives in her veins, riotous and unbending, it's will slithering through her very consciousness. She will not bow; she will not break. Not to this madness, not to him, and certainly, certainly, not to the sorrow which haunted her. She had shame in her past. She had sin. Monsters coiled in her gut; maggots ate at her morals -- but in this, she would not be wrong. Be strong, she thinks, but it is less thought, and more motivation. Yes, a song in the blood, a call to her heart, a call to arms. Be strong, be happy -- be vicious.

Her search is never ending, and this is just another turn in the maze that had been laid before her feet. Forever the darkness which crowd around her, and the Wolf rises, rising, stalks from one corner of her tilted eyes to the next, roving, salivating, knowing knowing. It exists for this girl, exists for the mere purpose of this freedom. She is the wild, the untainted purity in a girl which had been cast down and brutalized by life. Love? Who needed love when you had your strength? When you had the power of your paws, of your jaws to wrestle the very sun from the horizon and make a necklace of stars to put about your neck? Will you bow down little girl? Will you give in and become nothing, no one? Will you become exactly what they think of you?

Like this boy, she stands up against the irrational tyranny of adulthood. She is beyond time, beyond age; the feral nature of the Wolf is a primal urge which has tangled it's fingers in her hair, has lifted her up. Darkness, light; a creature forged of moonlight and wood work, a creature who's heart beat fire, who's paws bled red every night she ran until dawn. Desperation was just another facet of strength, a cousin to that delicious determination that tastes like metal on the tongue. His eyes are watching her as she speaks, as she drops those words like little toys from her tongue -- delights in the way she feels with his eyes touching hers, with the force of his personality rising to push against hers.

He is a predator, and the Wolf is licking it's lips, baring it's fangs. Stalking, stalking, it swings from one corner of her body to the next, rising like a tide of inevitability: joy surges through her body. Impossible elation, victory. Yes, this is the feeling, this is the fire which had almost been extinguished. She grabs it with her jaws the moment the last of her words slip off of her tongue, as her eyes playful and teasing, yes, fall into this mask, this version of self, seek out his own. Shh!

[/i] -- ears perk, her head tilts to look at the woman, small smile, innocuous smile. Don’t tell me to be quiet and spare her,[/i] -- her eyes whip back to him, watching, ready, observing each motion of muscle under his skin. Older than her, younger than her -- she dismissed age, took away the barriers of human thought and became perfectly, beautifully, Rin. Less than human, more than Wolf, she is at once one and the other, at once woman and beast, her cheek propped on the ledge as she smiles, that god damned smile of confidence, amusement. Did she toy with him? Perhaps, perhaps, but it is not to be cruel, but judgmental -- how far will he let himself be pushed? How far will he let her go before he lashes out at her.

Is this what she wants? To be punished? To test herself against the strength of this indignation? Would he fight for his honor? Cat, the unbidden emotion stems from the Wolf's approval. Cat, but not like Zeta, stupid and sluttish. No, this cat watched her as carefully as she watched him, waiting for the woman to make a move, waiting for the Wolf to make itself known. She smiles, a wretchedly gleeful little smirk that curls the corner of her mouth as she leans her hip against the shelf. I have no clue why I'm listening to her, if you really want to know.

His honesty delights her; the Wolf pants laughter, jaws cracking open to reveal thick fangs flashing through Rin's mind. Together they move, singular thought, singular intent, shifting forward as she reaches out, her fingers reaching past his and tipping out the book he had just put back. "Then don't." and she pulls the book out letting it fall to the floor with a dull thud. Her eyes slid away from his, dark and intelligent, brutal with their watchfulness -- she reaches out and snags out the last book he had put back, tilting her fingers dramatically until it could no longer hold it's battle against gravity. It fell, the librarian whipping her head around, meeting Rin's eyes. The girl smiles, and waves. "You don't seem the type to just give in anyway." she says, looking over her should at him. At five feet, she's small and petite, easily towered over by the world, but looking into her eyes, into the fire in her heart, you'd think she was seven feet tall.
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word count;; 1091
tags;; Luke
OOC;; to reciprocate: Plain bold are the Wolf's thoughts. "bold within quotes is Rin speaking." emphasis, or Rin's thoughts. Other people speaking. ^__^ 'cause I never thought to tell people lol oops.

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[Luke Bowers]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

Luke watched her carefully. Every time she moved, he was watching. Every time she spoke, he was listening. He didn’t know what it was. What emotions was he having towards her? Surely they were there. Did he feel threatened by her? Amused? Angry? The Jaguar was confused as well. He was anxious, but alert. Luke’s own human emotions mixed with the Jaguars, causing them both confusion in the process. He was starting to forget his argument with his family. If only for a moment. Dismissing their lies and secrets. The only innocent one was Toby. He was only a baby. He hadn’t had a chance to lie to him like that. Not yet.

What is she up to? Why had she stopped in the first place? Surely he wasn’t of any interest to her. Then again, he didn’t know her. He didn’t know what amused her and what didn’t. The only thing he had gotten from the other students in there were stares of annoyance or curiosity. It was probably the only thing interesting that happened around them. No, they didn’t rule out all of the fun. But they did limit it. You can have fun, but don’t go overboard. Don’t break the rules. Don’t get out of line. Don’t have fun. He watched as she smiled, but not a comforting one. One that could crawl under most people’s skins as it was threatening to do to him. She carefully moved and he watched her, reaching towards him. No, reaching towards the book that he had just put back onto the shelf. It fell, probably just barely missing his feet, but he didn’t know. He didn’t look. His eyes were still watching her.

"Then don't."

The curiosity was eating at him, though. He was tempted to see the librarian’s reaction. She had probably noticed after all. She seemed to hear everything. Too protective of her library and her books. He wondered if she would come back over or even say anything. Something told him this girl thought as he did. At least about authority. If that was true, he wondered how well the librarian handled two people who opposed it. His eyes pulled away from her and to the other book she was pulling out. It was another that he had put back. As he watched, time seemed to linger. She surely took her time in letting it fall to the ground. It almost felt as if she was testing him. Did she want to know how angry he would get if she messed up what he had just done? Did she want to test his patience? He wanted to say something, but was at a loss of words. He felt he needed to be careful with what he said, for whatever reason.

“I suppose we're a little on the same page then.”

Of course she was right; Luke knew that. He knew it and the Jaguar knew it. He shouldn’t have listened in the first place. That gave the librarian false hope that she could ever order him around. That she could order around any of those who opposed authority. But she had ordered him around. It had been all too easy, now that he thought about it. It was almost shameful. No. It was shameful.

”You don’t seem the type to just give in anyways.”

His eyes moved back to her again as she spoke. She was right. Again. She was crawling all over him and he knew it. Luke smirked slightly; he was impressed. Not many people impressed him at all, but he admitted she was good. In his head at least. He was impressed, but he couldn’t let his guard down. Not yet at least. He didn’t know if he could trust her or if he would ever be able to trust her. That would be a first. He never truly trusted anybody. He bit his lip and looked over at the librarian who was pretending not to be paying attention. But he could tell she was. It was hard not to notice her glancing up every ten seconds. He looked back at her and kicked the book in front of him. Not hard enough to send it flying, but just enough so that it slid across the floor a bit.

“That’s right. Me and authority don’t get along very well. Particularly with those that purposely use it to annoy me.” His eyes landed on where the book had gone. “Then again, I did let her walk all over me back there.”

The cell phone in his pocket began to vibrate – probably his parents, wanting to talk again. He didn’t have anything left to say to them right now. The conversation probably wouldn’t go well either with the mood he was in. They had started it and the librarian had fed it. This girl, on the other hand… was still a mystery.

tagged , Rin
words , 787
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , Interesting.
credit , rora @ hos

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[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

[/SIZE]
[/CENTER]

I suppose we're a little on the same page then. -- At once wrong, at once right, this speared through her, his voice slipping under her skin, elevating her up, up as if her very heart was opening up to a new strain of emotion, a new facet of her herself she had never known. Same page? Same thoughts? Kinship flickered through the darkness, sparked: two flints striking one another. Friction burns hard, burn deep, but it burned true and fast. Quick as lightning, branding on her skin. Same page? No, more than a page, more than anything she could understand -- it was this need to move when others would simply have you sit still. It was the violence that comes with freedom, the simplicity of thrashing, of letting go of all emotion in one fantastical explosion of self. It is the allure of dancing, the throaty sound of a Wolf's voice near your own; it is the temptation of the fire dancing just out of reach, just there -- to be held: do you have the courage to reach into the very pits of flame and ember? Will you be willing to be burned if it could bring you peace, happiness?

It was all she sought, in all her truest forms. She may smile, she may snarl, but it was all for the sake of her own happiness; denied, she would carve a place for herself, in blood and guts, thrusting herself into the dark realm of the forest and cry out against the world. Keep her down? Her arms crack where they strike you; blood seeps down her skin as she thrills in the hunt. Turn her away? She will circle, coming back again and again until her jaws find the very thing she seeks. Deny her? Destroy her, or there will be no safety.

The Wolf was never a heartless creature: she existed in an extreme world; she suffered and lived, and lived again, struggling through the pain, through the haunting of death crooning in her ear. The Wolf was more than just an animal: she was the ethereal madness of the moonlight made manifest. She was the heart of the forest, the haven -- in a pack, the wolves glorify in their strength, in their warmth. Pack animals to the core, was it any wonder that Rin reached out to tangle her fingers in everyone's shirt? That she sought, in her own way, her own words to be no one but herself, to have someone beside her when it was time for the world to fade? When darkness came, how brilliant the light of the moon with another next to you stretching you pace for pace, cheek to jowl, hip to hip --- running was exhilaration. Running was life.

He was close, and she knew it: she smelled it with each indrawn breath of that heavy musk of cat, that pungent odor of incense and burning flame. He smelled of heat, of sunlight poring through the shifting leaves; he smell of the forest floor, of warm rocks, and grass. Her eyes flashed as she looked over her shoulder as him, as she teased and cajoled him; Luke smelled like home. It was inevitable this meeting, set long before the red string of fate had draped around their wrists and their fingers, cinching tight around their waists; they were drawn, here, in this moment, with Rin looking over at him, her heart held in the very palm of her hands. It thrummed and beat, pulsing to it's own tune. Same page? No, deeper than that. They were of the same make. Did he know it? Looking at him sidelong as she turned her head, the Wolf lolled it's tongue, ears perked.

She had forgotten how wet she was: so far gone was this reality of musty books, Rin was on another trail, another path of mind and spirit. Would he follow? Would he know how to? In Luke's eyes, she glimpse a wildness akin to her own, a restlessness that she felt deeper than the fat in her marrow. Hips shifting, she leaned against the edge of the shelf, her eyes brilliant, as dark as the sky. Bottomless, fathomless, she seemed to absorb whatever fell before her gaze, hungering for more, more, more; devouring whatever lay before her. She was insatiable, and she glorified in it. He kicked the book; Rin's eyes never wavered, but watched the thoughts slither across his face. That’s right. Me and authority don’t get along very well. Particularly with those that purposely use it to annoy me. Then again, I did let her walk all over me back there.

[/i]

They were predators, speaking of a communal prey, wondering who would inch forward and begin the attack; they were two beings coexisting in a fucked up world, rejected by human norms and left to wander. A part, they wavered and stumbled from their path, but together? Rin was a pack animal, a creature that forms alliances of heart and mind, creating a safe haven amongst the ranks and dynamics of life and death. Apart, she was simply a wolf. Together, she was unstoppable. Be unstoppable with me? she wants to ask, but knows she cannot. He may not even know what it is she feels, this kinship, this intricacy. He may simply find her feral and strange; the Wolf does not permit doubts but roars to life along the surface of her skin, her senses growing keener as she listens to the thrumming of his heartbeat. Delicious beat after tantalizing beat, she watches him move, watches each muscle, each thought squirm over his flesh. The growing realization will not die, will not let her be until she must burst with it: Rin, distrusting, uncaring Rin has always relied too heavily on instincts, and it is instinct which has brought her to his feet, has brought her eyes to meet his, her tongue to dance amongst the language they share. It is instinct and a frightening loyalty and trust which makes her more dangerous for all timidity often given to her nature.

His scent changes, subtly, and she recognizes sorrow; knows how numb the mind can be from too much of it. Her eyes flick down to his pocket where the vibration rattles against his clothes; Rin tilts her head, looking at him inquiringly as he ignores it, his eyes pulling at her again. She smiles, suddenly, "Authority huh? So if I ordered you around, you wouldn't do it?" She makes a face, the Wolf raising it's nose as it scents the wind, and finds itself on the verge of bursting out of the girl's skin. "and here I was going to string you along as long as possible." she laughs, shortly, amusement dancing across her eyes as her gaze flicks down.

Sneakers muddy from being outside on the grass, Rin stepped daintily onto one of the books, looking down at it a little smugly as she said, "Never did like Moby Dick." She raises her chin, "You?" but the question is whimsical and half-hearted; instantly forgotten the moment she asks it.

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word count;; 1192
tags;; Luke
OOC;; my muse really likes this thread o.o

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[Luke Bowers]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

His eyes studied her with every move, every expression. Still, he found it hard to determine what she was thinking. Whether he could feel it and didn’t know how to put it into words or not didn’t matter. It all came down to one thing: curiosity. There was a type of attraction there that he hadn’t felt before. No, not her looks –although beautiful she was- but something deeper. Something more important than looks. She appeared calm on the outside, but who knows what was going on inside of her. The Jaguar was calm. He had to lose the anger towards his parents. It messed with his mind. Just as this girl was doing. But it was still two completely different things. She caused him mixed, indescribable emotions.

"Authority huh? So if I ordered you around, you wouldn't do it?"

The phone in his pocket continued to vibrate. His hand wrapped itself around it tightly, but then he released it, pushing the off button. They didn’t really want to make up. The only reason they continued calling, was because they wanted him to think they were right. They hated being wrong. They hated losing. "And here I was going to string you along as long as possible." He allowed himself a smile as she said this. Was she playing him?

“Probably not.” Luke pulled another book off the shelf. It was fairly thick with a brown binding. “But, maybe it would depend.”

Depend on what, he didn’t know. What she was ordering him to do? How much he liked the person telling him what to do? If he liked the person ordering him around enough, then perhaps he wouldn’t mind it so much. Given they didn’t use it to their advantage all the time. But he had never liked someone enough to take orders from them. He wasn’t even sure that it was possible for him to like someone enough to not mind taking orders from them. She stepped on a book, covering it with the mud from her shoes. He shook his head at her question and smirked, looking down at the book in his hands. Moby Dick was a classic, so to speak.

“No, not really. I’m not much of a book reader.” Either she didn’t like books either, or she just didn’t mind destroying them. Especially the ones she didn’t like. “What about you?”

He looked around until he had spotted what he had been looking for. It was out of sight for most people, but he didn’t care. The librarian would notice eventually. He towered over the trashcan and dropped the book into it. Since he had made the mistake of letting the librarian walk all over him, then it was only fair that he got her back for it. Books were probably her most prized possession, so that was the best thing to aim for. Luke tilted his head up towards the ceiling as the rain picked up, bouncing off the roof. The rain would feel good right now. But this girl... His eyes widened slightly as he turned to look back at her. She had come out of the rain; she probably didn’t want to go back. That wasn’t what surprised him, though. No, he was surprised because he cared. He wanted to stay around her. If only long enough to sort out the attraction he felt towards her or the mess of thoughts in his head.

They didn’t make sense to him. Not yet. This was not some petty love interest. Not one of the sad stories about a boy crushing on a girl he had just met. Just as it had run deeper than looks, it ran deeper than that. Luke regained his posture, mentally shaking himself. He crossed his arms and smiled slightly.

“So do you just like getting in everyone’s business or just torturing them?”

She had gotten in his business and practically had made him look like an idiot, undoing what he had done with the books. However, he was beginning to like her company. He wasn’t sure how likely it was that he would admit that out loud, but it was heading that way. So far.

tagged , Rin
words , 698
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , None.
credit , rora @ hos

[/color][/center][/font]

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

[/SIZE]
[/CENTER]

Emotions were powerful, extreme; they warped the heart to their bidding, fogged up the brain with their sincerity. With emotions, you cannot life -- only with your face, with the mask in the eyes: Rin tore down those masks with delight. Taking a certain satisfaction in finding truth where only falsehoods dwelt. It wasn't in her nature to lie, to omit, to hide. It is a weakness, a fault that runs deeper than blood -- it corrupts the soul, makes a person weaker, vulnerable. Lie, and you will die; lie, and you stop lying too others become that lie.

To someone who was so completely obsessed with being exactly who she was, in finding a place where she could scream out her heart, where she could shift at the slightest bidding, where the sweet pain of that shift was what she lived for, to lie, to become normal, frightened her. To be something without worth, something plain and simplistic, it wasn't something she wanted. Rin needed the world to acknowledge her, she wanted to run away from her sins, away from the darkness in her past Little brother!

[/s] the heart cries, suddenly, viciously with little provocation. So easily remembered, this pain; haunted by dark eyes, by a beautiful smile. A voice in her heart cries out but the Wolf does not understand this grief, though she is the cause of it.

An age old battle ensues within her heart as she stifles the feeling, as she focuses on other things, a lie, a lie, a lie -- and hates herself for one terrible moment of eternity stretching between the two of them. Wolf and woman circle each other, in hate, in love, in something more primal than human emotion. They are pack, they are one. Wolf and woman blend together in her mind's eye, within the tangled mess of her soul. There is no harmony, but a forceful need to be that pulls them taut. When they bleed, they bleed together. When they win, their victory is glorious. The Wolf will never lose; it's jaw gapes open, revealing it's fangs, it's ears perked up over it's head as it dances about the girl's heart, calling forth the fire, calls forth the untested mettle. Thunder rips through her heart, a distant sound of the Wolf's growls. Tread marks dig into her flesh, but it is a comforting pain as the Wolf fills her to bursting: too much for such a small girl. Too much presence, too much need to be contained in this small, harmless shape.

But him, yes him, he is moving as if he is unsure of her, as if he does not truly understand her; she smiles, quickly, fleetingly, her fingers twitching as she picks up the ends of her hair, braid them deftly, thoughtfully. Dangerous creature -- and she aches to lure him out, to hold onto this flame he has unleashed inside of her. There was a visceral need to be while he was here, while his eyes danced over her, judging, watching, waiting. Was it her move? Must she lure him out? Become Alpha? Become leader? The Wolf warms, the fires of her passion licking up the line of her paws in an electric frenzy. Let's play. -- wordless, this conveying of thought -- it is a feeling, gut-deep and wrenching her insides. It echoes, soundless, somehow, in her head, pulsing with each thump of her head within her breast. Is it time to let go? Is it time to be somewhere else? To do something else? He holds her in place with his mere presence: she glorifies in the heat. She takes his scent in her nose, saturates her brain with the smell of him, the nature of him -- cat, perhaps, but dangerous. Cat, perhaps, but wholeheartedly wild under it all. Not like the others, who simper and whimper, who look at her through the corner of their eyes. He stares at her straight on.

He sees through the bullshit.

Thrilled, Rin twists a little on the book, her eyes sparking deeply with the satisfaction of this find. Is it truth? Or simply her imagination? Perhaps she saw simply what she wanted to see? The Wolf snorts; the girl, almost, almost, giggles. "Heh." a breath slipping out from between her lips as she tilts her head slightly, the long stringy mess of her hair falling over her shoulder. So do you just like getting in everyone’s business or just torturing them?[/i]

Always watching, always vivid and avid, her personality was pushing out past the physicality of her body. The book fell to the bottom of the trash can; his head tilted up. Rain clattered against the ceiling. The library smelled musty. These things came in flashes of knowledge, swarming her as the senses made sense of a mess. "I hate most outsiders." she says, indifferently, her voice sounding almost contemptuous but for the thread of unease that squirmed in her gut. They always hurt her, in the end. Will you hurt me too? she thinks, her chin lifting as she props her cheek against her fist, elbow on the shelf. She stares at him as if she would peel back the layers of his consciousness and find this unsettling information forcibly -- but even Rin, no matter her desires -- can do this, and soon her eyes slide up toward the sun-roof window where rain splattered against the hard glass. "The only reason I'm here is because the library has a side entrance facing the woods. The dorms are right across, too, so it's just a short cut for me." she grins then, something feral twisting in her eyes, her fingers flicking in the vague direction of the librarian. "She's used to seeing me around."

Understand the flashes of memory: blood in her hands, naked, cold from the trashing storm as she crawls toward the back aisles and falls into unconsciousness. Fear making her shake as she slips through the side entrance and meet him for the first time. Running through aisles, jumping over chairs in her frantic need to escape from class. Following a lost trail of memory and coming across Luke for the first time.

Others come to the library to study. Rin comes here for warmth. "I'll show you if you want." and she hops off of the book, passing by Luke as she reaches the end of the aisle, looking over at him. "Coming?"
[/BLOCKQUOTE][/COLOR][/SIZE]

word count;; 1076
tags;; Luke ;3
OOC;; skidoosh ^_^

[/SIZE]

[Luke Bowers]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

Luke could see it in her eyes. Something. Excitement? Curiosity? He watched her mess with the ends of her hair. He knew, somehow, that he had to figure it out. Curiosity was somewhat common to him, but he had never been this curious about someone before. Most of the time he just didn’t care enough; he never had a reason to be very curious about anybody. But to him, she was interesting. He wanted to figure out why. At a glance, she looked like any other person. She looked normal. But she had attracted his attention from the very moment he had seen her. Since that moment he had known there was something deeper, but he didn’t know what.

”I hate most outsiders.

He smiled slightly, watching the book under her weight. It was a wonder the librarian hadn’t come back over yet. She probably hadn’t even seen what she had done. More than likely, when she did notice, she would find some way to blame it on him. It would of course be his fault. Minus the fact that he hadn’t been outside yet. By that time he would be gone anyways. Where, he didn’t know. But he wasn’t about to take more orders from her. If he was honest with himself, he had to thank this girl. She set his mind on track by undoing what he had done.

“I don’t blame you.” Not one bit. Who could you really trust? Everybody was an outsider until you found some way to trust them. But why trust an outsider in the first place? Everyone had a different way of looking at it. The main question was: Should I take that risk? Should you put yourself at risk for backstabbers and getting hurt? The truth was there was always that risk. In the end it was unavoidable. Even without friends, you were going to be lonely. It probably wasn’t the most positive way to look at it, but it was an accurate way to look at it. “I don’t like most outsiders either. They’re not trustworthy.”

”The only reason I'm here is because the library has a side entrance facing the woods. The dorms are right across, too, so it's just a short cut for me."

“Really? Impressive.” If she had been wanting to go to the woods, she would have gone straight there. If she had wanted to go to the dorms, she would have gone there. She was already outside before she came in. Had she been lead their somehow? Luke looked back up at her; in her eyes, still smiling. Or didn’t she know why she was there? He was curious and had to ask, even if he was wrong. “Why are you really here?”

He looked over at the librarian she gestured to. Did that mean she didn’t really like books either? Luke hadn’t ever really thought about it, but there was more than one way to use a library. Another thing they probably had in common. It didn’t matter how big or small those links were. All links added up one way or another.

”I’ll show you if you want.”

His previous expression was replaced with surprise as she got off the book. His eyes followed her as she walked passed him, but then he turned them back to the books on the floor and then to the one in the trash can. He looked up to the librarian who was distracted by a student looking for help. From far away, she looked like a nice person. Well, sort of. That’s how it was, though. You take a first glance,observe them from a distance, and get one opinion of them. It was different if you actually tried to get to know them.

”Coming?”

Luke nodded slightly and turned to follow her out before the librarian had a chance to try and stop him. She was no longer of interest to him. If he didn’t go, this girl would probably leave him there. Then he would have to wait to figure all of it out. It would itch at him until he found out.

tagged , Rin
words , 698
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , So lame. x.x
credit , rora @ hos

[/color][/center][/font]

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

[/SIZE]
[/CENTER]

Is there such a depth of emotion that stifles and deceives? Always, she's thought herself honest and forthright -- a straight forward soul struggling in a world of implications, and omissions. Always, she has separated herself from others, her nose picking up truths that the words had hidden, that the eyes had lacked. Always, always, running, hiding from the pain of betrayal, of conviction. Too many had looked at her and feared her; too many had smiled and touched her, had come too close to her in hopes of using her, abusing her. Too many ran from her; and some, just a select few, she could never reach again. Some became the stain of her existence; some, terrible some, such an awful word, an awful thought, were simply too dead to live in her heart. Who knows how many feet under they dwelt, their body ravaged, their eyes sucked cleaned by the bugs. Did the maggots eat away the rot in the brain? Did she care? Yes, yes she did, especially for him, for Taro. Little brother, the light in her heart -- extinguished in one fateful night of hell.

The Wolf, too used to this train of thought grumbled, shifting it's hackles from one side to the next, moving, moving, struggling to become more important than the deceased. We are alive. Feral adoration sets her heart aflame, even as Rin settles into this emotion, this tyranny of shame and sickness. She had killed him in the end. Had killed her own sister, poor Kimi, screaming for help, knowing it would never come. But it was Taro's eyes which haunted her, which she longed to see, which she longed to reach out for. It was Taro's shadow she chased during the night; Taro's laughter she thought to hear when she sang, his dimpled smile, his loving eyes. It was Taro, and it would always be Taro she looked for, though she knew she could never have; though she knew the moment she met his eyes, it would mean she had died.

Murderer, monster -- these were things she had defined herself by -- these things of pain, this existence spun out in duality. The Wolf feels no shame, no sorrow -- pushing the woman forward, even as she holds onto that memory. Even as she cherishes every moment she had had with him. It had been Murazar which had opened her heart, finally, finally -- relief, adoration, worship. Alpha. Pack. He had been the steadiness in her world, and it was shattered, now, yes... now. The Wolf knew who to blame, but Rin could only blame herself. She feels .... undone; her heart is twisting --- Why are you really here?

To die, her heart cries, but that is not something she will ever say; she is too proud to admit such a weakness. Why is she here? Why is she talking to him? Existing beside him? He holds her future in his hands unbeknownst -- walking in from the rain, from the pain of that downfall (the hot burning sensation of tears is but a step away from reality) she had come to no conclusion. Shattered realities; it wasn't enough for her to simply wait and watch -- it wasn't in Rin to hold back and let go when everything in the world was being taken from her. Could she sit still and listen? Could she wait? No, no -- not this time, not any time. She had almost died once, and had felt utterly disgusted with herself when she lived.

Now, now was not the time for dying -- now was the time for war, for winning, for victory. The wolf could skulk around Murazar for now, for now, but the Wolf knew, and Rin knew, eventually she would find her. Eventually she would give in to this awful rage that simmered beneath the pain. When there was no other option but to let go of his hand, she would become something monstrous, lose the last of her sanity, lose the last of her softness.

Why are you really here?

[/b] -- she smiles, slightly, painfully. Why was she here? Because God hated her. Because her family desired nothing but her death. Why was she here? Because Taro no longer lived, no longer breathed the same air, no longer laughed and grounded her to earth. Taro, her shining star, idolized in death as he had never been in life. It is forever the curse of the deceased and dying. "We all have our sins." she replies. Yes, yes, that is why she is here: her sins, smeared in blood and death on her soul. Alienated from everything she has ever known, given a new chance to live because the first time ended in murder, the second in fear; was the third time the charm? She didn't know -- the Wolf didn't care. It would forever run forward, never looking back. Rin? Rin could not stop herself from looking back, from peering back at the little glimpses of happiness she had; the same way she could not help looking back at him one more time. Age really didn't matter. There was something about him that rang true with her heart, with the beast that she had become.

Luke was right: if he had not followed, she would not have come back. Her fingers lightly grip the edge of the shelf as he looks around at their mess, warring, perhaps, with morals. She doesn't smile, "You can call me Rin, Luke." Better than Sayuri. Better than the name given in dismissal and indifference. Better to be named after their cold hatred, re-birthed into Rin, the beast. Re-birthed into Rin, the cold, dignified one. Better that than to cling onto the last vestiges of her childhood delusions. She had never been loved.

She's quick to move through the aisles, her stride unchanging as she pushes the fat coil of her wet hair over her shoulder to curl down her back; she pushes out the side door and into the very rain -- feeling it's cold fingers run down her face again as she tilts her head toward it. Her relief is evident on her face -- open space, wide, waiting. Her sigh, disguised by the rain. She spins slightly to face him, "Cat doesn't like to get wet?" she teases.
[/BLOCKQUOTE][/COLOR][/SIZE]

word count;; 1059
tags;; Luke ^-^
OOC;; It wasn't lame at all x3

[/SIZE]

[Luke Bowers]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

When he looked at her – when she looked at him- time seemed to freeze. It dragged on and the surroundings began to blur, almost disappearing. It frustrated him that he was so caught up in this. Yet he hadn’t done anything at all. They practically bumped into each other. Almost like chance, but not really. Not really like chance at all. Something about her screamed pain. Yes, pain. Her eyes, her smile. It was there, probably burning inside of her. This was the feeling inside of him. That he saw in her. But maybe he was imagining it. Maybe it was fake. He knew nothing about her really. Just that she apparently didn’t like books and she wasn’t too fond of authority. Just like him. Yet, they had met and he was drawn to… something. It was strange. Probably not normal. It wasn’t, was it?

”We all have our sins.”

"True," he said quietly, thinking. "Fair enough."

She was right. Luke had his own sins. Everyone had their sins. Some people deemed theirs bigger than others. Some say theirs are more important than others. In the end, sins were sins, though. Nobody was free of them. In the end, they affected everyone one way or another. They couldn’t be escaped; they were unavoidable, real. Sometimes they were purposely commited. Could one really say that they were, at times, accidents?

”You can call me Rin, Luke.”

Rin. The name echoed through his mind. He paused slightly when he started to follow. She was full of surprises. He had no doubt about that at all. Luke followed her through the aisles and paused at the door, looking over his shoulder at the librarian. She was completely oblivious to anything they had done or were doing right then. Like she had forgotten about them almost. He didn’t feel bad about the mess they had left. No. He was just curious about whether he should have felt different about it. But who was to determine that? Who decided how someone should feel after certain things? He turned back to face her as she spun around towards him.

”Cat doesn’t like to get wet?” He smiled slightly at her teasing.

“This cat does.”

He stepped out into the rain, letting the door close behind him. The rain was coming down hard and fast. But it felt good. Luke took a few steps forward, tilted his head up towards the sky, and spread out his arms. The rain fell onto his hair, his face, onto his clothes, and on his hands. It ran down his neck, down his collarbone, down to his skin below his shirt. It was cool on his skin. Jaguars actually loved water, unlike most cats. He lowered his arms and looked around. The fresh air was nice. It was refreshing. Perhaps if he had gone there first, he wouldn’t have gotten into that trouble. But then he didn’t know if he would have met this girl either. He turned to face her.

The cell phone vibrated in his pocket again and he gritted his teeth as he pulled it out. He cupped his hand over it just enough to see who it was. Them again. They were like a couple who had just broken up. They were the obsessed one, constantly calling and texting. He was the one trying to get away. But they were deceiving him. Frustrated, he paced a little. He didn’t want to answer. But if he did, perhaps they would leave him alone. It stopped vibrating and he placed it into his pocket.

“Family is nothing,” he told himself quietly, no longer pacing, but facing her. As he stared at her, he remembered what he had wanted to ask her about. “How did you know my name?”

tagged , Rin
words , 808
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , Really? That makes me feel better about it then.
credit , rora @ hos

[/color][/center][/font]

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

[/SIZE]
[/CENTER]

She was getting lost in herself again, losing her grip on reality as she plunged into the cool flames (yes, cold, so cold they burned) of her sins. Drowning, almost, as fire raced up the lengths of her arms, consuming, eating, devouring: as hungry as the black in her eyes. Fathomless, bottomless, they leached the very life out of her -- become nothing but t his it seemed to say, it seemed to croon as she fell into a boundless, endless sleep. She walked without God, without pack by her side: completely alienated by her very nature, the very uncontainable wildness she treasured most about herself.

So the question, the worry, the fork in the path that she must always choose: give up what it most true about yourself, or be alone, cast down in shame, poisoned by the ignominy of this isolation? She chose, time and again, her face hard, her eyes unyielding. Herself, always herself -- but the yearning cannot be quieted, the want could not be stifled by mere knowledge. In her heart, when there was no one with her but the Wolf, but the quiet, lonely howling of the Wolf, Rin knew she could not continue on her own. She was not meant for loneliness, was not meant for a world to walk on her own. So she reached out, again and again, a child not realizing the very flame that burned her was of her own making. Rin, poor, Rin, darling, broken Rin had been recast in iron and steel, her heart the flame that ran the machinery --but underneath it all was a maze that she must continue to walk. Each curve of her veins, each thrumming melody uttered by her heart was but an echo of her footsteps, tapping, tapping, tapping on the floor of this maze. She must walk, or face extinction: she must continue, or know herself lost.

The girl and the Wolf were in a battle, hand in paw, eye to eye, hackles raised, weapons lifted: they battled the world, unable to submit to this scrutiny. Yes, she reached out, again and again, unable to stop the need from making her hands trembling, from making her eyes flick to yours. She tries, yes, yes, but she knows deep down that this isn't the one, you aren't really the one that will make her heart race in tune with yours. You will hurt me, too, she thinks, her hair plastered to her neck, her back, her face -- dark and nefarious next to the sheer paleness of her skin. Made of contrasts, it was no wonder her personality stretched from one extreme to the next.

She was wild, and carefree -- disregarding the norms to be as happy as she could: but darkness was in her eyes, a shadow of a past deed, a past adoration gone sour from her own hands, her own jaws. Yearning did not describe it: and so she ran. This time, she had run into Luke, her eyes igniting with the fires of her passion, the grating of his personality rubbing up against her own and sparking a flame she could be proud of. Here, she could be alive -- with him, she could draw out his wildness, could be equal in this, if nothing else. Rin smiles and tuts, and cajoles, her heart swarming with these alluring wants and desires: she wants him to let go, to thrash and scream, to let go of the very pain which caused him to break away from his path. Let's be wild! she thinks, the Wolf howling in her head, a thunder of footsteps echoing through the snarls.

The Wolf ravages the insides of the girl, unhappy with the cage she had been consigned to: but Rin only welcomes the pain, for it is a pain that is real -- a pain she can understand. Frustration, anger, spitefulness -- these are things that are welcome, for they are things she can comprehend. But Taro? Guilt? Shame? These feelings of kinship that have only just been vomited across the span of her heart? She did not know, but instinct was moving her feet as he spoke -- pacing, pacing, his fingers tight around the cellphone.

Lifting his head toward the rain, she sees a version oh herself cast in blond, cast in a different shape, a different make: but still very much the same. Two strings cast aside for newer ones -- but didn't they know that the strings create a depth of emotion unattainable to those which had not been used? Family is nothing -- she hears but cannot believe it. To a wolf, family is everything --- without pack, without the support of dynamics and wisdom, all is lost. To the Wolf, who knew the pains of human families, she simply snorts: the girl is already moving though he has stopped, though his eyes feel hot where they touch her as if they are burning for an answer he cannot ask. Pack, the Wolf says wordlessly, an emotional complexity of fierce loyalty surging up to tickle her tongue with metallic determination. She smiles as she gets closer, as the distance between their bodies closes to feet, and slowly to inches: the din of the rain roaring about their ears is only coupled by the thrashing of her heart as she reaches outward palm upward. How did you know my name? -- she smiles, slightly but it does not stop the Wolf from claiming him. "Give it to me." she says, staring up at him, a hard line in her mouth demanding his compliance. "You were talking to yourself--" she adds, but she will not be waylaid and lifts her palm upward, standing too close to him: the musk of the cat tickles her nose, but she ignores it, as she ignores the chill of the rain pounding down on them. "Give me your phone."

[/SIZE]

word count;; 989
tags;; Luke ;3
OOC;; Rin is so awkward xD

[/SIZE]

[Luke Bowers]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

Life was so difficult at times. Why was it so difficult? Why did it have to be that way? Maybe it was his fault. It was his fault it was so difficult. Maybe if he complied with what everyone wanted him to do. Be a goody two shoes, listen to everyone, follow their rules. Do as they told him to do. But no, he had to be different. He had to disobey. He really did. Pretending to like following orders was a lie. He would be living a lie and that was no life at all. The Jaguar was quiet. Observant, but quiet. They were quiet in general, watching. Stalking their prey. Ambushing them. That would be the full life of Luke, but he needed someone. Someone he could depend on. But he needed someone who could trust him in return. Someone who could trust him just as much as he would trust them. That wouldn’t be easy on his part. It would take awhile. But if they were anything like him, it wouldn’t be easy for them either.

They would have to test one another, but at the same time have each other’s backs. They would have to overcome odds to prove their loyalty to one another. To prove that trust. He didn’t want someone he couldn’t fight with. No, someone he could trust, was someone he could communicate with. Even through anger. No matter how much they would argue, they would still be friends. They would get through it. How could they be his friend, if they couldn’t deal with arguments? He had never had a friend like that. Never had a family like that. His own family had always settled the argument, always against him. They always had the final say. It was no wonder he couldn’t trust anybody. Maybe if people were a little more trustworthy…

His thoughts were interrupted by her movement, slow but still moving. The distance between them was closing until she was right in front of him. She was oh so very close to him; he could almost feel her. His eyes searched her own as he curiously waited. To see what she would say. To see what she would do. She didn’t answer his question, no. Instead she dismissed it and smiled. Her hand was held out towards him, as if she wanted something. ”Give it to me.”

“What?”

His hand gripped his cell phone as he took it out of his pocket and pulled it back, out of her reach. He knew that was what she wanted. His cell phone, but he wasn’t sure why. ”You were talking to yourself.” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. A fact. Yes, he had been talking to himself. Did she find that strange?

“I was talking to the Jaguar.” He used his free hand to wipe water from his eyes. His shirt was beginning to soak through now, clinging to his skin as it did. Sometimes he could talk sense into himself, when he talked to himself. The Jaguar understood him. Most of the time. “Does the wolf talk to you?”

She lifted her hand further, palm held up as she waited for him to hand it to her. He didn’t have to, no. But the question was: will he? What could she want with it? Half of him knew. She would probably destroy it. But he wasn’t sure why, unless she just didn’t like it vibrating. That was the only reason he could think she would have interest in it. She was straightforward, to say the least. ”Give me your phone.” Luke took a deep breath and hesitated, watching her. Slowly he reached forward and placed the phone into her hand.

“Fine.”

tagged , Rin
words , 622
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , Somehow it's better that's she's bossing him around than an adult, lol.
credit , rora @ hos

[/color][/center][/font]

[Natsumi Sayuri]

+ NATSUMI SAYURI +
•••CALL ME RIN•••


My beautiful liar why are you crying on your knees?
You've crucified yourself and now denial is rising...rising...

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It was a test of wills that clashed as powerfully as the rain around them. She, terrible, she always pushing, always prodding, forcing her way through the crowds toward her destination, pushing people down, cutting them at the knee if they were in the way of her wants, and her desires. So he stood, in the way of what she wanted; her eyes were enigmatic -- a book laid out for reading. Each emotion slipped through the surface: happiness, stubbornness, sadness, anger. These and more, pulsing and moving, as wickedly alive as her very breath, more real to her than anything else in the world. What was she without these feelings? Without knowing that the numbness of loneliness could not be stamped out from the heat of anger? The spicy tang of stubbornness? Luke had smelled of home to her, and she, lonely, terrified, didn't want to let go of the nostalgia: not quite yet.

Did it matter what his feelings were? Did it matter if he made her feel this way? In some part of Rin, she wanted to share this emotion, wanted to hand it over with the openness that was second nature in her heart. She wanted so many things, to simply exist in pure bliss. Could she let go of everything? Yes, yes, and she was, she was letting it all go, falling away from her, even as she held onto to the darkest shadows which lurked in her skin. Dual natured -- the pain and the rage were as important to her as the laughter and the smiles. Each was a special aspect of Rin, a facet of self that makes the whole. Without it, she was incomplete: an unfinished painting, a figure in two dimensional existence.

To live in such a way? She could not bare it; with him so close, his will wavering, rising, and deflating again, she felt herself growing whole, feeling as if she were about to burst. This was what it was like -- this pleasure of victory, this pleasure of power. Trust, the Wolf growled, wordlessly, an emotional tsunami come to crash through her soul and wipe it of her sins.

What? -- she felt herself leaning in, but her eyes would not part from his, not now, not quite yet -- he was on the verge of giving in, hesitating, thinking. He had done the same before, this physical need to revolt, but feeling as if perhaps, just perhaps he should just submit and let others rule him. She did not understand this hesitation -- for she was truly a straight forward girl. She gave herself to one path and followed it until it no longer satisfied her. So it was that her hand raised, that she demanded. I was talking to the Jaguar. Does the wolf talk to you? -- and a misunderstanding disoriented her. Rin blinked, rain falling into her eyes, even as he dumped the phone into her hand; her fingers closed around it, smiling ever so slightly as he said, Fine, and gave it up to her.

She turns then, giving him her back without moving away -- standing too close for someone she just met; but then, normal standards had never really defined Rin, had it? She flipped the phone open as she covered it, searching for the number, flicking her thumb over the numbers and lifting it to her ear. A ring, two rings, three -- it droned on and on until a click told her it was answered. "He has more important things to do. Stop calling." and she flipped the phone closed, disinterested in a reply; looking over her shoulder at him, she lifted and eyebrow and said, "Feel better?" and the Wolf swarmed forward at the girl's askance, slipping down the small narrow limbs of her arms, and giving her strength, giving her that heat, of that riotous flame as she twisted the phone, taking the top off of it's hinges and dislocating it from the key pad; she dropped it into the mud and spun back around, nodding slightly. "Stop using words. It's easier if you use," she pointed at his chest, "your heart to talk to the beast." she shrugged, took a step back and tilted her head into the rain, saying absently, "But that's not what I meant. I mean you were talking to yourself -- you said your own name."

Rin slid her fingers into her scalp, lifting the long mane of black hair upward, twisting it deftly. "I feel a lot better." she turned to look at him, smiling slightly -- teasing, honestly? Who knew, who knew, "Don't you?"

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word count;; 777
tags;; Oli ^__________^ 'cause I saw it on your app and I think it's a cute nickname xD
OOC;; Awesome word count number. I think I'll make a wish.

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[Luke Bowers]

* LUKE ( OLIVER ) BOWERS ,

It felt wrong to him. Wrong to submit so easily. To submit at all. He had done it to the librarian – that was a mistake. Now he was doing it to this girl. Yes, he admitted that in some way, she captivated him. She wholeheartedly captivated him. It was strange, awkward. But amazing in the same way. Her smile was trying to force it’s way under his skin. Pleasurable smiles. Satisfaction. He watched quietly as she turned her back to him. Oh, but he knew she was not off guard. No, not at all. She was looking through his phone and seemed to have found what she was looking for.

“He has more important things to do. Stop calling.” He knew what had happened. He hadn’t been expecting it, but it was interesting to say the least. In some way it did make him feel better. Then again, he had told them countless times to stop, but they hadn’t. He tried to reach for his phone, but she tore it apart and let it fall to the ground. Into the mud. He looked down at it, annoyed. In one way he had been expecting it, but in another sense he didn’t think she would actually do it. Mistake number one. Scratch that. Mistake number two. The first was even giving his cell phone to her in the first place.

“What was that for?”

Of course, it was rhetorical. He knew why she had done it. Now she would lecture him about how to speak to the Jaguar. Sure, he used his heart. But who else was he supposed to speak to? He found it almost a waste of time to bother with people, if he knew he wasn’t going to trust them. What was the point in tempting yourself in that aspect? It only made it worse. He looked at her again, still frustrated with her destroying his phone. She was satisfied. Of course she felt better. He threw his hands in the air.

“Right. I knew that.”

Something else had occurred to him now. Maybe she captivated everyone she came across somehow. Maybe she used that against them. Just maybe she was playing him somehow. She was a wolf. Probably thought she was top dog. It was hard to believe in one sense, though. There was something different about the way she went about it. By now he realized it wasn’t so hard to understand the confusion. It was everywhere he turned when he was around her. Jaguars didn’t submit so easily. What was wrong with him? Why was he giving in so easily? Captivating or not, was that really an excuse? There had been no excuse for the librarian. Maybe there wasn’t one for this girl either.

“Damnit.”

What did she really want with him? To control him? Did she actually like telling him what to do? A small part of him felt something else about that. In a way, that part of him didn’t mind doing as she said. She was straight forward and strong. She was bold and confident. Very confident. All the traits of a leader. The rest of him was frustrated by this, though. Maybe he didn’t have all of the traits of a leader. But that was because he didn’t want to lead anybody. He just didn’t want to be ruled by anybody either. Not that everything went his way. Apparently. It felt to him as if she was just reeling him in. Probably mocking him on the inside, while appearing calm on the outside.

“Is that what you like to do? Claim everybody?” During his thinking, he had turned around, but was now turning back towards her. He took a step closer, leaning forward slowly, but only a little. “Jaguars don’t get claimed. If anything, they do the claiming.”

He moved back and lightly kicked his cell phone in the mud. That wasn’t what he was truly mad about. Who would he have called anyways? It was about him losing control of himself. Letting her walk all over him. Letting her take control. Jaguars didn’t do that. He didn’t do that. But somehow it had just happened. One minute it was somewhat neutral and next thing he knew, he was doing her bidding. Somehow. He slowly began to move away, but stopped after a moment.

“And yes, I do feel better.”

tagged , Rin
words , 729
lyrics , run this town - jay-z
notes , If you want to use it, fine by me!
credit , rora @ hos

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